Why the hell do I notice every flaw?
Folks, folks, listen up, I am down 27.2 pounds! You heard me right, 27.2 pounds! Damn right bitches!
So, what the fuck is wrong with me that every time I look in the mirror or see a pic of me I notice flaws? What the hell is wrong with me that I cannot see what I have done and how much weight I have lost?
Why is my body image so fucked up? WHY I ask you?
The other day I went shopping and where did I go right to? The fucking big girl section. Why do I keep doing that? I am not that big of a girl any more. I mean I can buy in the regular section now but every damn time I go straight to the Misses Plus section. Have I been so beat down<I beat myself down>that I am programmed to see myself as a big girl forever?
I am NOT turning into one of those eating problems girls am I? Is that how it starts? Seeing yourself as big and you are not? I mean, I have 22.8 pounds still to go so it is not like I am skin and bones. Hell my trainer told me the other day to be careful because my face was getting too thin! Is she fucking kidding me? I have 22.8 pounds left to go!
The other day I saw a gal I had not seen in right at a year and she thought the hubs and I had gotten a divorce and I was his new girlfriend. She said she did not recognize me.
Don't get me wrong folks, I am happy that I am losing weight but why does it have to come with these issues. I want to look in the mirror and see me, not some fucked up image that is programmed into my sick brain! Maybe I need professional help? Oh yeah sure, you all laugh on the inside thinking, that bitch needed professional help 20 years ago.
Well I tell you one thing, I am not stopping eating right and exercising! Boot camp is back in swing and I am loving it! Hell I signed up to do the 5K Color Run!
Well until next time, I may or may not seek out professional help. Be healthy my bitches!!!!!
Thursday, April 25, 2013
Friday, February 15, 2013
I have a one track mind these days.........
No, you pervs, not like that, wrong blog for that. Get your damn minds out of the gutter<to make more room for mine>.
All I think about is food. 24-7. Food. Since I have started this diet, whole fresh foods, nothing processed, I think about food all the damn time. And not like, oh I would die for some cookies, or I would do anything for some cake<I really would do ANYTHING for some chocolate chip cookie dough right this second>but about good food.
What am I going to cook? How am I going to make that shit taste better? How much of that can I eat? How much does that weigh? I tell you, it is fucking exhausting!
And let me just tell you, I may single handily end the chicken population. I have had so much damn chicken I get angry thinking about it. And I fucking cook every damn night. GAWD, do you know how a dirty kitchen every day messes with my OCD? I am so scared to eat out because of what might be cooked in the food.
So is this how healthy<skinny bitches>people live every single day? Is this how they stay skinny? I guess if it is, then I am gonna keep with it. I have lost 8.8 pounds so far. Which is good but damn, I want to lose MORE!
AND I have come to the conclusion that I have to give up beer. YES I FUCKING SAID BEER! Beer is proof the God loves you and wants you to be happy, right. Hey I did change the kind of beer that I drink to the lowest calorie kind before water. And I noticed a change. But when I drink beers on the weekend<yea I usually only drink on the weekends, I am a fucking weekend drunk>I do not lose as much weight as I do when I don't drink. So, it is back to the no cal, no carb drink mix<hell I bought almost $100 worth of that shit, guess I really should start using it again>. It is good but I only like to mix it with Parton and that shit is expensive<us high class big girls like the good stuff>.
So, there you have it my friends. That is where I am at. Until next time, drink a damn beer for me bitches. Peace out and eat chicken<fucking chicken anyways>!
All I think about is food. 24-7. Food. Since I have started this diet, whole fresh foods, nothing processed, I think about food all the damn time. And not like, oh I would die for some cookies, or I would do anything for some cake<I really would do ANYTHING for some chocolate chip cookie dough right this second>but about good food.
What am I going to cook? How am I going to make that shit taste better? How much of that can I eat? How much does that weigh? I tell you, it is fucking exhausting!
And let me just tell you, I may single handily end the chicken population. I have had so much damn chicken I get angry thinking about it. And I fucking cook every damn night. GAWD, do you know how a dirty kitchen every day messes with my OCD? I am so scared to eat out because of what might be cooked in the food.
So is this how healthy<skinny bitches>people live every single day? Is this how they stay skinny? I guess if it is, then I am gonna keep with it. I have lost 8.8 pounds so far. Which is good but damn, I want to lose MORE!
AND I have come to the conclusion that I have to give up beer. YES I FUCKING SAID BEER! Beer is proof the God loves you and wants you to be happy, right. Hey I did change the kind of beer that I drink to the lowest calorie kind before water. And I noticed a change. But when I drink beers on the weekend<yea I usually only drink on the weekends, I am a fucking weekend drunk>I do not lose as much weight as I do when I don't drink. So, it is back to the no cal, no carb drink mix<hell I bought almost $100 worth of that shit, guess I really should start using it again>. It is good but I only like to mix it with Parton and that shit is expensive<us high class big girls like the good stuff>.
So, there you have it my friends. That is where I am at. Until next time, drink a damn beer for me bitches. Peace out and eat chicken<fucking chicken anyways>!
Thursday, January 31, 2013
Who the hell starts a new diet.............
the week before their birthday and Super Bowl weekend?
That dumbass would be me! Yes, I started a new diet and I am already down 4.8 pounds! Fuckin'A!
One of my girlfriends got a hold of me and we were talking and found out that we both have<yes I said have to lose, I want to look goooood this summer in a swim suit and not have to wear a moo moo to cover me up>to lose 30 pounds. That is the 30 I have left of the 50 pounds I want to lose.
She is helping me with what I eat. Whole foods and not nasty processed foods. Drinking protein and more water. Actually eating the right things, eating less and reprogramming myself. I am loving it!<I mean who would not love it after 4.8 pounds in the first couple of days!>
So, anyway I started this diet a few days before my birthday and it is also Super Bowl weekend. EEK! If you remember last year on my birthday I ate an entire coconut cake that is way better than sex. I hope to not do those things this year. I mean I am going to be 29<again> and you would think I could control myself. And all the goodies at the Super Bowl party, what is a big starving girl too do?
I GOT THIS BITCHES! I WILL NOT CHEAT! I WILL LOSE THESE LAST 30 POUNDS BEFORE MY NEXT 29TH BIRTHDAY!!!!
That dumbass would be me! Yes, I started a new diet and I am already down 4.8 pounds! Fuckin'A!
One of my girlfriends got a hold of me and we were talking and found out that we both have<yes I said have to lose, I want to look goooood this summer in a swim suit and not have to wear a moo moo to cover me up>to lose 30 pounds. That is the 30 I have left of the 50 pounds I want to lose.
She is helping me with what I eat. Whole foods and not nasty processed foods. Drinking protein and more water. Actually eating the right things, eating less and reprogramming myself. I am loving it!<I mean who would not love it after 4.8 pounds in the first couple of days!>
So, anyway I started this diet a few days before my birthday and it is also Super Bowl weekend. EEK! If you remember last year on my birthday I ate an entire coconut cake that is way better than sex. I hope to not do those things this year. I mean I am going to be 29<again> and you would think I could control myself. And all the goodies at the Super Bowl party, what is a big starving girl too do?
I GOT THIS BITCHES! I WILL NOT CHEAT! I WILL LOSE THESE LAST 30 POUNDS BEFORE MY NEXT 29TH BIRTHDAY!!!!
Thursday, January 24, 2013
I'm stuck....In a rut..........I'm laaaaaazy
but not in an exercise way, in a eating and cooking way. I mean it is just easier to eat whatever and not plan out a good for you meal.
Yes, it has been a while since I last posted. Seems like I have been busy or something. Maybe I have not felt funny<blogging is much more fun when you FEEL funny, no I don't know why...it just does damn it>
I have not lost ANY weight in a loooooong time. Over the holidays I maintained and did not gain but I am just stuck.
The hubby and I have started a Turbo Kickboxing class and are having a blast! So, I am not being lazy there. I try to make good choices when I eat and when I cook but something has to change! I use skim milk instead of whole milk. 3% cheese, wheat pasta and all that shit, and nothing. Maybe my body is storing blubber for the winter<I fucking hate winter>or something like that. Who the hell knows. Maybe my body is a hoarder and cannot let go of the fat<I am NOT a hoarder, trust me, the less stuff I have, the better, who wants to have to dust shit, not me, get rid of the shit people>
So, I was chatting with one of my friends yesterday and she has gotten very serious about her diet and is going to help me with mine. I need a buddy to help me with this<lord knows the hubby won't, fucking Frosty eating fool>so we are gonna text everyday and send pics to each other every day<lord I hope she does not share the pics of me that I am going to send, EEW> I am ready to turn the page and get to shedding pounds! This ass still looks nasty in a swimsuit!
Hey bitches, I am gonna try to keep up on this blog, lord knows you all live and die by what I write<okay, I had to stop typing that because I was laughing, live and die by what I write, ha, yeah right, gawd could I be more arrogant? I am sure I could but I don't want to lose my bitches!>
Okay, let's DO THIS and LOSE some weight! Until next time, don't be a lazy eater or cooker like me<well shit, now what am I gonna do with that free fucking pizza I won, I mean it is free, who ignores free, who the hell ignores pizza for that matter...GAWD HELP ME>.
Yes, it has been a while since I last posted. Seems like I have been busy or something. Maybe I have not felt funny<blogging is much more fun when you FEEL funny, no I don't know why...it just does damn it>
I have not lost ANY weight in a loooooong time. Over the holidays I maintained and did not gain but I am just stuck.
The hubby and I have started a Turbo Kickboxing class and are having a blast! So, I am not being lazy there. I try to make good choices when I eat and when I cook but something has to change! I use skim milk instead of whole milk. 3% cheese, wheat pasta and all that shit, and nothing. Maybe my body is storing blubber for the winter<I fucking hate winter>or something like that. Who the hell knows. Maybe my body is a hoarder and cannot let go of the fat<I am NOT a hoarder, trust me, the less stuff I have, the better, who wants to have to dust shit, not me, get rid of the shit people>
So, I was chatting with one of my friends yesterday and she has gotten very serious about her diet and is going to help me with mine. I need a buddy to help me with this<lord knows the hubby won't, fucking Frosty eating fool>so we are gonna text everyday and send pics to each other every day<lord I hope she does not share the pics of me that I am going to send, EEW> I am ready to turn the page and get to shedding pounds! This ass still looks nasty in a swimsuit!
Hey bitches, I am gonna try to keep up on this blog, lord knows you all live and die by what I write<okay, I had to stop typing that because I was laughing, live and die by what I write, ha, yeah right, gawd could I be more arrogant? I am sure I could but I don't want to lose my bitches!>
Okay, let's DO THIS and LOSE some weight! Until next time, don't be a lazy eater or cooker like me<well shit, now what am I gonna do with that free fucking pizza I won, I mean it is free, who ignores free, who the hell ignores pizza for that matter...GAWD HELP ME>.
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