Thursday, April 25, 2013

Mirror Mirror on the Wall..........

Why the hell do I notice every flaw?

Folks, folks, listen up, I am down 27.2 pounds! You heard me right, 27.2 pounds! Damn right bitches!

So, what the fuck is wrong with me that every time I look in the mirror or see a pic of me I notice flaws? What the hell is wrong with me that I cannot see what I have done and how much weight I have lost?

Why is my body image so fucked up? WHY I ask you?

The other day I went shopping and where did I go right to? The fucking big girl section. Why do I keep doing that? I am not that big of a girl any more. I mean I can buy in the regular section now but every damn time I go straight to the Misses Plus section. Have I been so beat down<I beat myself down>that I am programmed to see myself as a big girl forever?

I am NOT turning into one of those eating problems girls am I? Is that how it starts? Seeing yourself as big and you are not? I mean, I have 22.8 pounds still to go so it is not like I am skin and bones. Hell my trainer told me the other day to be careful because my face was getting too thin! Is she fucking kidding me? I have 22.8 pounds left to go!

The other day I saw a gal I had not seen in right at a year and she thought the hubs and I had gotten a divorce and I was his new girlfriend. She said she did not recognize me.

Don't get me wrong folks, I am happy that I am losing weight but why does it have to come with these issues. I want to look in the mirror and see me, not some fucked up image that is programmed into my sick brain! Maybe I need professional help? Oh yeah sure, you all laugh on the inside thinking, that bitch needed professional help 20 years ago.

Well I tell you one thing, I am not stopping eating right and exercising! Boot camp is back in swing and I am loving it! Hell I signed up to do the 5K Color Run!

Well until next time, I may or may not seek out professional help. Be healthy my bitches!!!!!

1 comment:

  1. I do that too and I'm down 45 pounds! Stay with it. You will get there. Onward and upward!

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